So in a few hours Polkraine kicks off and, dreams will be realised and dreams will be shattered, but England will no doubt continue to follow their dream of mediocrity. Hosting the Euros will irrevocably damage the reputations of these countries forever though, no longer will they be surprisingly large states credited with vodka (shutup Russia) and chicken Kievs, but a huge gathering of racists.
Due to the fact that a small minority of silly little boys that sometimes call themselves nationalists have confused previous controlling states with black and Asian people, many players this tournament will be affected by racism. The news will get allll over this and most people will come away thinking that Polish and Ukrainian people are racist. Unlucky all you normal people out there.
On to the matter in hand:
Poland – Robert Lewandowski
The powerful forward will no doubt play at the top of a 4-2-3-1 for Poland, requiring him to score or create the bulk of the goals. Aided by the talents of Borussia Dotmund team-mate Blaszczykowski, he is sure to score this tournament, and is capable of being the charge Poland need to ignite a good campaign. I would have picked Wojciech Szczczczesny (yes i added a bit) but seeing as it’s Greece they’re playing he will only be sunning himself until a set piece.
Prediction: They’ll get out the group with a bit of home spirit and the Dortmund connection.
Greece – Vasilis Torosidis
Let’s get one thing clear. I don’t like Greek football since Euro 2004 qualifying. No I don’t appreciate their solidarity without the ball, or their power from corners, or their brick wall goal. But if I had to then I would pick Torosidis. A relatively experienced fall back capable of playing on either side, Torosidis’ power and strength embody the Greek strategy, and every so often he turns up with a goal.
Prediction: Don’t offer enough to get out the group and now everyone has cottoned on they’ll struggle.
Russia – Pavel Pogrebnyak
I don’t know the likelihood of Pogrebnyak starting but he will make an appearance at some point. After a great half-season with Fulham (6 goals in 8 apps) and with a current record of a goal every 4 games for Russia, ‘the cellar’ could have a great tournament. He may perhaps have to usurp Roman Pavlyuchenko and I am judging him on a handful of games but you never know…
Prediction: Have enough stars to beat the others, can win the group.
Czech Republic – Tomas Rosicky
‘The little Mozart’ has had his form undulate like a mountain range at Arsenal but ended the season, like Arsenal, on the up. He seemingly found his drive and started becoming an important player for the Gunners in creative midfield role. The Czechs rely on him even more, and he provides – seven goals more for the Republic than Arsenal and in 33 games less.
Predictions: Even if Rosicky has a good one, they’ll find it hard to get out the group.
Stay tuned for the other groups.