Monthly Archives: July 2012

Weekly Roundup: Olympic Fever Edition

Match Lookback (Olympics)

Group A: Well Team GB go into tomorrow’s game with Uruguay only needing a draw to get to the draw. After a mediocre performance against a Senegalese team of lumberjacks (because they were massive and obsessed with chopping), they came good against a weak UAE team. Scott Sinclair and Daniel Sturridge provided clinical finishing, and Giggs showed that he isn’t out of greatness yet with a classy header.

Uruguay have thus been disappointing and will be looking to turn it around in Cardiff, with Suarez looking to get on the goal tally. Senegal will no doubt go guns blazing at the Emrities – a team that deserve credit. Ranked 138 in the world they possess a clinical finish, with assist merchant Omar Abdulrahman Al Amoodi really catching my eye.

Group B: Mexico and South Korea are unsurprisingly bossing this group. Gabon and Switzerland both have a physical quality but nothing of the class that players like Spurs benchwarmer Giovani dos Santos and Arsenal man of mystery Park Chu-YoungThe Swiss can still qualify with a big enough win margin in Cardiff though.

Group C: Brazil are going to win the Olympic gold in football. Chelsea new boy Oscar and Santos wonderkid Neymar look immense, and are backed up with quality like Hulk, Marcelo, Alexandre Pato, and Thiago SilvaNo group would be too strong for them, especially not Belarus, Egypt, and New Zealand. Those three still technically have qualification to play for, but with the Kiwis having Brazil we can rule them out. Leaving a Belarus inspired by Brazillian born Renan Bressan against an Egyptian team who did score two against Brazil…

‘In your face country of my birth!’

Group D: Well as expected Spain are top of… the… what? Against bookies predictions, a competent Japanese team and a fortunate Honduras team have put Spain outta the running. Spain were led in incompetence and uncertainty by David de Gea against Japan and could have been on the end of a tonking. Juan Mata performed well against the Hondurans but it wasn’t enough to overturn Jerry Bengston‘s third goal of the competition.

Morocco will now be attempting climb a mountain to topple the central Americans from the second spot. Though they can rest in the knowledge that Zakaria Labyad‘s goal against Honduras is one of the tournament’s best.

News Reel

Let’s begin with the media’s latest plaything – racism! John Terry has been charged by the FA despite being cleared in court, this seems to have baffled some people but really makes sense when you think about it. Go Here to hear why he isn’t evil.

Not to be outdone, brother of Terry offendee Rio Ferdinand has also found himself on the FA’s naughty step after being charged for his cold confectionery themed quip at Ca$hley.

Another entrant in the twitter racism debacle is Morganella Michel, a Switzerman who has found himself thrown out of the Olympics after abusing, well, the entire nation of South Korea. After SK’s win he wrote (roughly translated) “I want to beat up all South Koreans. Bunch of mentally handicapped retards.” Classy.

In the same week as Leo: Creative Essence, Messi’s wine was released, Barcelona have been in the news for all the right reasons. Gabriel is an eleven year old boy who was essentially born without feet. Not letting that stop him, he has become a beast of a player for his school football team and recently featured on Brazillian TV stating that it was a dream of his to train with Barca.

Well Barcelona saw this via their Rio de Janeiro academy and invited the kid for an entry test, which he passed with ease, granting him a week-long training course with them. Actually Classy.

Seems Zlatan Ibrahimovic has settled well at French moneybag storage center PSG, scoring in under two minutes of his debut. The goal is pretty tasty too so check it out.

Transfer Trawl

Chelsea completed the signing of Brazillian starlet Oscar for £25mil, an attacking midfielder like most of Chelsea’s team. Expect to see a few Blues on the way out.

Get it? Oscar…

Liverpool have apparently opened Joe Allen‘s release clause with a lovely £13.5mil. Roger’s main orchestrater at Swansea looks set to join a fairly useless Liverpool midfield, and although we cannot judge his performances until we see them, it seems the Reds have overpaid once again.

In the ship out of Merseyside it looks like once highly rated Italian midfielder Alberto Aquilani is going to head back to his native land with Fiorentina, and Andy Carroll back to his native footballing land of massive hoofed balls. Apparently West Ham are going to give Liverpool £2 million for the season with a possible £17 million purchase at the end. The Reds only seem to deal in wacky business.

Speaking of wacky business, Stephen Pienaar is heading back to Everton. After leaving the Toffees for Spurs’ bench, then being loaned back, he’s now heading to a place where he is liked, actually gets to play, and is happy – in one of the most obvious moves of the market.

Norwich are continuing their theme of purchasing Leeds’ captains and have captured the midfield man Robert Snodgrass about two years after someone should have brought him up to the Prem.

Blackburn Rovers only glimmer of hope Canadian winger Junior Hoilett is off to QPR. He really looked a quality attacker last season so hopefully QPR will stop being so bland up front.

Transfer Troll

After new signing Leon Best is ruled out for six months, Blackburn are considering two strikers to replace his talents. Hmm, Ali Dia and David N’Gog?

Video of the Week

Witness the moment where Man City super scorer Sergio Aguero is equally stunned and impressed by the intense striking technique of one David Platt. Watch your back Kun, Platty’s making a comeback.

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Weekly Roundup: Choc Ice Edition

Hello and welcome to Post and In’s roundup of the footballing week’s news. This will (hopefully) be a regular feature including some fun news, some juicy transfer gems, the video of the week, and some match lookbacks when there are actually some matches. So tune in regularly and pretend there isn’t like a million sites with up-to-the-second info.

News Reel

Rio Ferdinand clearly hasn’t learned much from his endless twitter hours. Mr.# replied to a tweet in which Ashley Cole was referred to as a choc ice as “classic”, and is now being investigated by the po-po after totally innocent members of the public were offended.

‘I respect all ethnicities fam’

Famous Kung-Fu kicker and part-time footballing god Eric Cantona was apparently so enraged by Sergio Aguero’s title-winning goal that he put his foot through the living room coffee table like it was a Palace fan.

Bolton fan Dennis Swift was so disillusioned with Owen Coyle’s management that he took to penning a small poetry book about the dire state of the club. After it being refused sale in the club shop he turned the pen on the shop’s chief and found himself unbelievably visited by the police. Dennis said:

My memory was working overtime I tried so hard to think
Of whom I had offended when I`m influenced by drink
And when they said the football club were offended by my rhymes
I mentioned that the Wanderers were way behind their times

Seriously.

Didier Drogba settled nicely in his new team Shanghai Shenhua, marking his debut with a lovely assist. Seems £800,000 a month is just the right amount to help someone settle.

 

Transfer Trawl

Robin van Persie has some big boys chasing him after refusing a contract at Arsenal that would only see him be able to purchase one three bedroom house a month. Juventus, Man United, and Man City all leapt at the chance to table their £15mil – only to see Wenger laugh at their optimism and ask them to double it.

Luka Modric just doesn’t like AVB. After failing to move to Chelsea when the manager was plying his trade for the Blues, he now wants away since Andy arrived in Tottenham. Deciding not to bother turning up to Spur’s pre-season tour the midfield goblin looks set for a trip to either Paris or Madrid.

AC Milan are in such financial worries that they’ve had to let a pretty decent Champions League Squad of yesteryear go out to pasture. Just look at this set:

Legends. And Aquilani.

In particular, the sales of the Zlatan and immense center half Thiago Silva have irked fans (I felt some pain knowing that no longer would we be able to witness Seedorf in his natural habitat of the Champs League), causing AC Milan to refund any season tickets.

Tim Cahill has traded in the drizzle of Merseyside for the drizzle of the Big Apple in a £1 million transfer. Too bad the flag punching Socceroo’s eight year stay at Everton ended with a bit of a whimper, at least the Liverpool defence can breathe a sigh of relief though.

£10 million seems to be the number, as both Joe Allen and Victor Moses have their asking prices touted ahead of prospective Liverpool and Chelsea moves.

Transfer Troll

Arsene Wenger has said he intends to inject the £30mil from van Persie’s sale into one high profile striker. Lol jk. He’s gonna buy seven 12 year olds that will knock your team out of the Carling Cup.

 

Video of the Week

Only a day or so after the entire nation of Great Britain turned its back on David Beckham, the maestro of the right instep showed us what we’d be missing with a brace against Portland. Wall or no wall – the same technique and it’s never being saved.

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John Terry: He’s Not Racist But You Hate Him

Warning: This post isn’t really about on-field football.

Warning II: I will be defending John Terry throughout.

So JT is clear. Instead of racially abusing Anton ‘my brother thinks it’s funny to call Ashley Cole “choc ice”‘ Ferdinand, Terry was merely repeating what he thought he had said; not “ringoing black ringo!”, but “you think I called you a ringoing black ringo?” (all naughty words to be replaced by ‘ringo’ because it is a cheerful word).

Ringo Yeah!

This was the defence originally, five days after the game; that he would be lip read saying ‘black ringo’ and such but was not saying it maliciously. Although this could still cause offence to Ferdinand, it isn’t a crime I don’t think. Don’t try it.

So England’s past captain and 73 cap holder, domestic honours captain, Champions League winner, and all round patriotic face of English defence is not guilty. His and England’s image are restored by the definitive nature of the law, clean. So why aren’t we happy?

He’s a footballing national treasure, a titanic center back full of goal line clearances and body on the line defending, all wrapped up in thighs like tree trunks. But you would begrudge me to admit that wouldn’t you.

In fact, I’d wager that most of you reading this actively dislike him. You didn’t like him before the trial and you don’t like him afterwards. Perhaps you even gave a cynical remark after the verdict was released ‘bet the FA don’t charge him either’, or somehow suggested that a footballer was in control of the court and the verdict was rigged.

You know, it would just be easier to admit that he didn’t do it. That your fantasy of him being a racist didn’t come off. Why you hating on him? He (probably) hasn’t wronged you in life. You probably haven’t even seen him in the flesh.

But then, he is a master of disguise.

So you did not begin your life hating him and you did not begin to hate him after he wronged you in some way. If you hate him for footballing reasons (scored a goal against you, lost you a bet, is too slow etc) then you may leave now, you’re clean. But the rest of you really need to think about why you dislike this guy.

Well actually you don’t, cos I’m going to tell you – because the press want you to.

See we live in a society where the celebrity is key. They are more known celebs than the leaders of our countries and the generals of our wars, therefore they are more important. But we don’t know them, we don’t know their motives or their goals – they are just heavily scrutinised people.

Heavily scrutinised people don’t sell newspapers or internet advertising. So they give them a persona. Some are built up tall and untouchable, only ever the victim of any negative events. Some, like John Terry, unfortunately get the role of villain.

The villains are watched at all times, sums of money for anyone with dirt on them are offered, and a back catalogue of sins are amassed. After one or two misdemeanors, stories can begin with ‘nun punching, dolphin harpooning film star…’ and thus the villain is created.

The accuracy of these evil acts is not relevant, once the character is created they are hated. Instead of thinking about reasons you hate the celebrity, you just know you do.

Many celebrities of more cultural arts protect themselves from this with a barrier of reasonable education, experienced Hollywood PRs, and lawyers. But a kid growing up in east London and caught in the whirlwind of becoming a professional footballer doesn’t have the nous or the staff to protect himself.

More so than most, Terry actually dug his own grave with a few wreckless actions in his early 20s. The press smelled blood and sent their flying robots from what the real world looks like in the matrix after him. And didn’t he deliver. But just how bad is the villain behind the construct?

Consider yourself censored.

It began with the ‘9/11’ party. Grounded during a European game due to the terrorist attack the previous day, some Chelsea lads went a bit mad around Heathrow. Eidur Gudjohnsen threw peanuts at people. Lampard wee’d in a bin. They mucked around at a bowling alley. They were not respectful around Americans, they were not sad like they should’ve been.

Look how the Mirror put it “[Americans] were treated to the players throwing food around while pictures were shown of sobbing firemen searching through the rubble for the dead, before one player exposed himself to the appalled throng.

That’s called fabrication. They could literally been having a food fight, or just throwing a few peanuts around some pints. And because this was from an article about Terry, we know he wasn’t the player who ‘exposed himself’ or it would be in capitals. Terry was fined wages but didn’t appear to be one the antagonists.

Next was a typical nightclub hoo-ha in which Terry was cleared by a court of all charges. I’m not going to tell you what they were like the press do because that’s another way of attaching negativity. Not guilty. The same month (he was always destined to lose), the trillion pound earner parked his squillion pound Bentley in a disabled bay for two hours while eating dinner with his family. The press loved it, we hated him, tabs were being kept everywhere.

That resulted in first finding his mum and in-law guilty of tea leafing at Tescos, and then his dad was caught in a reporter sting dealing cocaine. I don’t know the result of Terry snr.’s crime because the press don’t care about a drug dealer, who would when we can relate his crime through his son!

And why Terry snr. out of all the drug dealers? To help make the evil Terry jnr. look eviler of course! Judge Mitchell even said: “It is a very, very clear case of entrapment solely to create a newspaper story.” Sure drug dealers should be busted, but not to sell papers about their sons.

Then came the biggey. John Terry slept with Wayne Bridge’s wife.

Or did he? Well let’s lay some facts down:

  • Wayne Bridge and Vanessa Perroncel were never married but have a child.
  • The alleged affair began a month after they split. So it was only an affair on Terry’s part due to his marriage.
  • The alleged affair lasted four months.
  • Perroncel still maintains it never happened.
  • The News of the World who covered the story like acne, were forced to print an apology: “she would have preferred her personal information to remain private and it was untrue in any case.

So really the issue is he cheated on his wife, and possibly broke several man laws, losing a friend in the process. It’s bad, but Ryan Giggs slept with his sister-in-law for an apparent eight years – no one seems bothered about him.

From then on the press has been awash with opinions about whether he should put on an England shirt or captain’s armband again. This lead to FA overruling Fabio Capello and making JT ineligible to be captain – leading to Capello’s resignation. After an initial bollocking Capello obviously thought enough of Terry’s character that he would’ve had him captaining England again.

The last thing ‘the bionic man’ did which brought the headlines before the Ferdinand debacle was the ‘Cape Town Coup’, where he went all Machiavelli and tried to instigate a player vs manager tactical change. Only England’s version of Roy Keane forgot to get the other players on board first. He left himself hanging out, and in the end lost respect from the England fans.

Fair enough, the press conference was the wrong way to go about it but it wasn’t all bad; Terry wanted someone like Joe Cole on the left wing instead of Gerrard – and Gerrard in the center, he wanted Rooney up front alone, without Heskey. I seemed to spend most of our games screaming these things at the tv during too.

I just… why?

Do you know who else confronted their manager about tactics after two group games? England players circa Italia 90. They talked it over with Robson and England got to the semis with the reviewed tactics. But we don’t hate Gary Lineker for it.

In the end if we look at the facts, if innocent until proven otherwise is still a thing, the haters can only hate John Terry for cheating on his wife and parking in a disable space. He lacked respect around American’s during 9/11’s aftermath because he was young, drunk, and stupid. His parents embarrassed him terribly. He lost a friend over a girl as so many men have done.

Y’all probably know of someone who has had an affair, it’s horrible, but John Terry didn’t invent it and his isn’t the worst.

Parking in a disabled space is arrogant, ignorant, and stupid. All traits of a young male. I will not ever condone that, but I will hate him no more than the able-bodied guy I saw in a disabled bay at Sainsburys.

So next time the camera zooms in on Terry remonstrating normally with a referee, withhold the urge to shout something witty about adultery from your ivory tower and just consider why you dislike him – because of his football or because of the stories?

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