Norwich’s Loss to Villa Through the Eyes of a Lady

Most big football sites have a journalist at games to give them a real insight into how the events unfolded – and Post or Worse is no different as we have Rachel the genius behind Puss in Boutique handmade cat collars.

When she isn’t making your cat look like a cockney Rach is an avid Norwich fan and can probably name some sort of starting eleven. She braved the cold last night at Carrow Road with a head full of optimism, only to be crushed as the Canaries slumped to a 4-1 defeat at the hands of Villa.

Her PA sent me the match review

Her PA sent me the match review

It probably stung the yellow faithful more that the architect of their downfall was none other than ex-Norwich boss Paul ‘about as fun as a wet newspaper’ Lambert… Or not – apparently there were five teenage spectators in front of our reporter that were not paying enough attention!

Fortunately Rach didn’t have that problem, so here’s the info:

Norwich

Sebastian Bassong, the Canaries’ 2nd top scorer, had a good game apparently. A sign of promise for Houghton as he regularly outperforms the remnants of Lambert’s back four. Holt and Morrison should have made more of sloppy mistakes by Villa and perhaps this lack of clinical finishing was Norwich’s downfall once again. But I don’t know, she didn’t say.

Someone also scored for them but it was very foggy down that end.

Yeah... that guy

Yeah… that guy

Aston Villa

Shay Given had apparently pepped himself up before the game because he was looking over-confident and kept “coming out a bit too much and messing about”, hey no one said the analysis would be kind. All I heard was that he made some of the finest saves this season, but I wasn’t there.

Villa scored four, but again the weather conspired against our match reporter who was thwarted by the teams changing ends at halftime – an event she missed due to the extraordinary wait for her friend Chloe to get a Bovril.

Atmosphere

Things weren’t much better elsewhere of the low attention spanning teenagers, as Delia couldn’t be spotted – where are the players meant to look for inspiration? The claret and blue ultras didn’t impress either; “The Villa fans looked scary and were very noisy. They obviously love the cold as one of them removed their shirt!”

 

Well there you have it, the game carved apart for you by Rachel. Now go and buy a collar, your cat looks like a savage.

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